Feb 21st 9:15pm 2011
Being All one vs Being Out ToGetHer
Being Alone and realizing and accepting that I walk this process alone for me as all as life is reality is what is real is what will work and stand the test of time as myself. Being out to get her, out to be together with another will never stand the test of time as I will then always be looking and never realize that I stand as all as one, All One. Within together, I look for another being to hold onto in which I place an idea of myself of `together` with another being in which it will never stand the test of time as within death we separate, so being together is an absolute lie to myself, and I deceive myself within believing that I am together with someone and that I have company and that I am not alone. In reality yes I am not alone yet I am alone, as I am the only one responsible for myself. I am not physically alone but I must stand alone in each moment as All One, to realize myself as equal to all live. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to only consider the human in/as existence. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to consider all life within/as existence.
Being together means that I am searching = To Get Her. Wanting another to `complete` me not realizing that I am complete as myself alone as All One, as one as myself. I am dishonest within searching outside of myself for anything as standing Alone means that I am All One, as all as life meaning that everything does not exist outside of me as life as All one, standing alone as me as life. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to search outside of myself for `completion` of myself. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I am complete as myself alone. This does not mean that I am perfect in any way, I must live myself alone and realize that I am All one, and stand as the principles of myself as equality and actually live equality firstly to then understand even the concept of perfection of myself alone as all one. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to stand alone as all one of a group as everyone as the group thus looking out for the group as myself alone as all one as the group. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to search for another as myself not realizing that I am the other as myself and the other is me as them, thus not needing to search outside of myself, only needing to realize that I am them as myself in equality and oneness as we both will stand alone. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to stand alone as all one as life as me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to write this with others in mind and not standing alone as me as all one standing as me knowing that writing this for myself alone means that I write this for all as one. That is neat.
Showing posts with label Alone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Alone. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Socializing and `Falling`
Feb 16th 2011 10:03pm
I am here right now finishing the last of the `The girl who` movies, If you are not familiar it doesn’t matter lol. I have started to write and watch movies at the same time. The distraction of this is quite interesting. I have done this before and I get distracted quite easily by the video and forget and stop caring about writing. I start to become much more interested in the movie than in writing. Right now I see a difference. I am not as distracted. I am able to type effectively and watch the movie together. I notice that I am much more distracted with facebook than anything else. I plan to write or to do something and I become entanced by facebook and start to look at everything and purposely distract myself with socialization.
Socialization is a large distraction and falling point for me. When smoking cigarettes socializing was my biggest point to move through. To stand alone was my biggest point within that. When I was falling on that point I desired to be included within the socialization so I would give into smoking so that I could socialize. One large point was that within work where a co-worker who I did not know too well smoked and at a point where I was working with him, he asked me to go out for a cigarette. That morning I stood with confidence in stopping smoking and that point took me over. I socialized and went for a smoke, debating with myself to not do that yet I gave in to socializing within smoking. Within that moment I did not stand under my own principles but gave myself up to a want to socialize. As well this happened many times, as I have placed others as more than me. When I think about it now and place myself within that situation there is a fear of falling again within that point where I see someone as much more than me who smokes and asks me to smoke and within that I give in to socializing with them as I want to be like them. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place my own actions outside of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become an idea of myself in the situation of being in an environemtn where I believe someone is `more than me` in which I become the idea of myself that I should follow the superior being.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I must follow a superior being.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I am one and equal with all beings, all life, all of existence as myself.
So I am sure that I am not the only one who falls within socializing, becoming an idea of who they should be within the context of the situation. For which I say stand as yourself, Breathe and bring yourself back into your body instead of comparing yourself with the other. Breathe and make sure that you stand absolutely as yourself with no doubt of who you are within that moment, not being an idea of yourself, but standing as yourself as your principles. Remove the want to be like the `superior being` and place yourself equal to the other, Know that you are equal to the other, and allow yourself to stand as yourself. Breathe, make sure you stick to breath…this could be for drinking, smoking, doing something criminal, or simply laughing along when you know that you think it is not funny, just to fit in and socialize.
Socializing has become a large enslavement point for many beings. It is the experience of placing yourself less than another for some stupid fucking reason, and wanting to be like the superior being, thus mimicking them standing as an idea of yourself being less than and as well an idea of who you want to be within comparison to the other. Stand as yourself and this is done within breath. Can only be done within breath. Stop giving yourself up humanity to some bullshit ideals of yourself…trying to be the ideal person of yourself through following the `superior being` constantly within an infinite loop.
To start to research breath and what humanity as yourself have really become Join Desteni visit http:/desteni.co.za Humanity needs to change and the tools and the support provided within the site/group is phenomenal, it is unfathomable, as one will never see support like this outside of the site, as all others are systems all following their ideals of themselves, become the ideal of yourself through creating yourself within breath of each moment. Stand as yourself, Stand as Life! Join Desteni, Support an Equal Money system http://equalmoney.org
I am here right now finishing the last of the `The girl who` movies, If you are not familiar it doesn’t matter lol. I have started to write and watch movies at the same time. The distraction of this is quite interesting. I have done this before and I get distracted quite easily by the video and forget and stop caring about writing. I start to become much more interested in the movie than in writing. Right now I see a difference. I am not as distracted. I am able to type effectively and watch the movie together. I notice that I am much more distracted with facebook than anything else. I plan to write or to do something and I become entanced by facebook and start to look at everything and purposely distract myself with socialization.
Socialization is a large distraction and falling point for me. When smoking cigarettes socializing was my biggest point to move through. To stand alone was my biggest point within that. When I was falling on that point I desired to be included within the socialization so I would give into smoking so that I could socialize. One large point was that within work where a co-worker who I did not know too well smoked and at a point where I was working with him, he asked me to go out for a cigarette. That morning I stood with confidence in stopping smoking and that point took me over. I socialized and went for a smoke, debating with myself to not do that yet I gave in to socializing within smoking. Within that moment I did not stand under my own principles but gave myself up to a want to socialize. As well this happened many times, as I have placed others as more than me. When I think about it now and place myself within that situation there is a fear of falling again within that point where I see someone as much more than me who smokes and asks me to smoke and within that I give in to socializing with them as I want to be like them. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to place my own actions outside of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become an idea of myself in the situation of being in an environemtn where I believe someone is `more than me` in which I become the idea of myself that I should follow the superior being.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I must follow a superior being.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that I am one and equal with all beings, all life, all of existence as myself.
So I am sure that I am not the only one who falls within socializing, becoming an idea of who they should be within the context of the situation. For which I say stand as yourself, Breathe and bring yourself back into your body instead of comparing yourself with the other. Breathe and make sure that you stand absolutely as yourself with no doubt of who you are within that moment, not being an idea of yourself, but standing as yourself as your principles. Remove the want to be like the `superior being` and place yourself equal to the other, Know that you are equal to the other, and allow yourself to stand as yourself. Breathe, make sure you stick to breath…this could be for drinking, smoking, doing something criminal, or simply laughing along when you know that you think it is not funny, just to fit in and socialize.
Socializing has become a large enslavement point for many beings. It is the experience of placing yourself less than another for some stupid fucking reason, and wanting to be like the superior being, thus mimicking them standing as an idea of yourself being less than and as well an idea of who you want to be within comparison to the other. Stand as yourself and this is done within breath. Can only be done within breath. Stop giving yourself up humanity to some bullshit ideals of yourself…trying to be the ideal person of yourself through following the `superior being` constantly within an infinite loop.
To start to research breath and what humanity as yourself have really become Join Desteni visit http:/desteni.co.za Humanity needs to change and the tools and the support provided within the site/group is phenomenal, it is unfathomable, as one will never see support like this outside of the site, as all others are systems all following their ideals of themselves, become the ideal of yourself through creating yourself within breath of each moment. Stand as yourself, Stand as Life! Join Desteni, Support an Equal Money system http://equalmoney.org
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Being alone and Work
When I am alone, I start to think rapidly, I start to project myself into conversations with people, I start to involve myself within ego and think according to ego. This all exists within work…I can still exist the same way when I am alone and not working. I start to become very aggravated with myself…I try and stop and fail ove rand over again, and within the there obviously is friction and then I create a negative energy…cool did not see that before. When I am alone..from looking at the past, I start to think immediately out of fear. I fear being alone, and fear my application of myself when I am alone I fear not being good enough to support me. I fear a lot when I am alone and try to escape that fear by becoming tense and thinking a lot to take myself away from being here. So today while working I was looking at this, and when someone would ask me a question or I would converse with someone then I would HOLD on to that conversation and place it as a memory and replay it because it was holding onto that person within that I was holding onto that moment of not being alone. I noticed that when I knew that someone would be around me for a while in which I could express myself the way I think I am…For instance when a outside worker for Nestle came and helped out for a bit I started to talk to her as a being not a worker and allowed myself to not fear being seen as a bad worker but as a human. And within this I thought that I was expressing myself the way I am..and within this I became relaxed and stopped fighting with myself and stopped thinking. I stopped thinking rapidly within that moment of knowing that I have company as many of my thoughts were conversations or projectional. I noticed that it was because I believed that I now how company to exist with me and support me. After she left I went back into my mind and warred with myself again…This point is from support. My forgiveness was on the point that t revolves around…me supporting me and fearing supporting me, as I have had others to support me for my life until just recently. So what happens is that when I am alone I become very tense and constricted and I am trying to in every moment control myself in what I believe I have to do or what is best for me. I am contantly thinking about having to do, and I must do, and trying to figure out how the future is going to happen so that I can be prepared and then not have to worry about it = bullshit. I noticed that when Ithought about knowing that I am going to be around my mother/sister/father/friend in a future point, I become relaxed in that I can wait for them to support myself and them to support me. I literally wait. I have not ate before because I was going to get supported by food from another in a future point. This is why I am angry within work, because I am not trusting myself to support myself through/as work. I fear not being good enough to keep the job thus not being able to support myself…What a parent would go through with these same thoughts would be horrendous. I fear not being `capable` of supporting myself. I fear myself allowing myself to allow myself to die….Like I fear not being able to support myself monetarily and eating right and living so I constantly project myself to escape the fact that I have to support myself, that I must take responsibility for myself in every moment. I become very tense when I am alone. I was unaware of this tenseness before and therefore I was unaware of the fear…this is cool to see. The physical directly relates to the mental. I purposely made myself believe that I was going to meet my dad later in the day today, and I completely relaxed within that moment, relaxed with the sense of I no longer need to support myself in every moment, that I have him to support me, and that I can let go of all these worries and fears that I hold onto. It obviously is a fear of not being able to support myself, and a reliance on others to support me and the fact that I trust them to support me in what is best for me, and that I do not trust myself to support myself in what is best for me. I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to trust myself to support my life, my existence. I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be aware of the fact that I have demonstrated that I can support my life. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a programmed belief that I cannot support myself. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want others to support me. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rely on others, mainly family and friends, to support me. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up on supporting myself as life, through allowing others to support me. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that others will stop me if I am going to fall. I feel that I need to be prepared and plan out for the future so that I do not `lose` myself, lose my personality. Within that I believe that I need to prepare myself in who I believe myself to be so that I can keep who I believe myself to be within as personality as I am projecting from the past as who I am….Thank you Sally. When I project it is out of a fear of not being able to keep myself the way that I am used to…that I must `improvise` within the moment of not being prepared, that I cannot rely on my knowledge of myself to support me within knowing how I will be within that moment so that I can be prepared within KNOWING how I will be, thus not allowing myself to be myself as life within the moment. I forgivemyself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing the idea/knowledge of who I am. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto the knowledge of who I am. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am knowledge. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as knowledge.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Most Miserable City in Canada
Least happy city in Canada
Toronto Was voted the most miserable, not voted but concluded upon, city in the country. Lets look at Toronto. It has roughly 1 million people living in the city. There are a lot of businesses, It is not self sustainable. Toronto Vs the Country. The country is open, the country, you can see a lot of nature. In a city one is bombarded with lights and advertisements, always looking for something to buy, being programmed to search to buy something. Being programmed to search outside of self with the use of money for happiness. No one is there to help, everyone looks out for themselves. Where is the enjoyment in that. When no one is around to help out one becomes depressed. Everyone is searching for there next paycheck, Everyone is in a rush to get the next paycheck, so no one is looking out for the neighbour. So when people help eachother out it is much nicer to live, because you are living with someone, you are not alone, which when one looks at it there are people all around us yet we believe ourselves to be absolutely alone, that everyone else is a stranger, they are stranger than you, do not speak fear them for their strangeness. Everyone is walking around for themselves. Anyhow Happiness is immeasurable, people are happy and sad, and when one has to constantly fight for survival because no one is helping then one will become frustrated, because we all like to be helped out in this world. I tested this out, In work I work alone and with people, I enjoy working with people because the more people working on a task the faster it goes and the more fun one has because you can help eachother out. When working alone it becomes much more stressful because one has to work out all problems alone and sometimes we do not give ourselves the insight we need because we are blinded by the stress and anger and frustration. That is why Toronto is the most miserable city in Canada, In an Equal money system everyone will be working for everyone=unlimited fun and joy and self-Expression.
Toronto Was voted the most miserable, not voted but concluded upon, city in the country. Lets look at Toronto. It has roughly 1 million people living in the city. There are a lot of businesses, It is not self sustainable. Toronto Vs the Country. The country is open, the country, you can see a lot of nature. In a city one is bombarded with lights and advertisements, always looking for something to buy, being programmed to search to buy something. Being programmed to search outside of self with the use of money for happiness. No one is there to help, everyone looks out for themselves. Where is the enjoyment in that. When no one is around to help out one becomes depressed. Everyone is searching for there next paycheck, Everyone is in a rush to get the next paycheck, so no one is looking out for the neighbour. So when people help eachother out it is much nicer to live, because you are living with someone, you are not alone, which when one looks at it there are people all around us yet we believe ourselves to be absolutely alone, that everyone else is a stranger, they are stranger than you, do not speak fear them for their strangeness. Everyone is walking around for themselves. Anyhow Happiness is immeasurable, people are happy and sad, and when one has to constantly fight for survival because no one is helping then one will become frustrated, because we all like to be helped out in this world. I tested this out, In work I work alone and with people, I enjoy working with people because the more people working on a task the faster it goes and the more fun one has because you can help eachother out. When working alone it becomes much more stressful because one has to work out all problems alone and sometimes we do not give ourselves the insight we need because we are blinded by the stress and anger and frustration. That is why Toronto is the most miserable city in Canada, In an Equal money system everyone will be working for everyone=unlimited fun and joy and self-Expression.
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