Attainment of Enlightenment or the `American Dream` is worthless

June 2^nd 2011
I realized that my life is currently worthless from a perspective on individual experience. I was sitting in a doctors office, getting an update of my life as a diabetic. I find out that my average blood sugar level is well above normal. So I take a look at my life and the future of my life and realize one thing, it is meaningless there is no purpose other than to live here in the moment and change this world so that other people do not have to experience it in this hell that it is, worrying about my life in terms of dying is purposeless...I am going to die and to only focus on my own experience of `happiness` or living the `dream` is useless as it ends when I die yet the abusive existence that is here will still exist when I die.

So to give you perspective, I am a type 1 diabetic who smokes or has been smoking for about 2 and a half years, meaning that my heart muscle is incredibly weak and that I will die earlier than `average`. I am working 2 minimum wage jobs, I have just lost my benefits for my medication which is insulin so I mean I must find a new job with benefits or pay a fuck load of money to get insulin!!!which to me is fucking crazy to call `life`. My schooling option is limited due to education, time management, and money. Mainly money, because I am living on my own, most of my time is dedicated to working so that I m able to pay for bills, medication, food, etc life’s necessities, therefore I am limited to career choices and thus money. So since death is here as me, what matters? Does having a career, having kids, a house, a white picket fence matter? To me no not at all. In death why work my ass off to get something that has no value in death, no impact on the condition of life. The `American Dream` is all in pursuit of self-interest and now looking at it = it won’t fucking matter if I have that or don’t. It is not happiness to me, it is not life, it is still enslavement to the exact same fucking system only in a different environment, still existent within the same abusive, non-caring for life system. Does enlightenment matter? Nope not from my perspective, because I would still be in this shit system that does not care for life, only cares for itself, meaning that the system only exists to support and prolong the system itself, it is not there for life, therefore my `enlightenment` matters only if I have enough money to support that fucking bullshit idea, when the money runs out, my belly aches and I get brought the fuck back to the physical and then `nirvana` is destroyed. So attaining `enlightenment` does not matter against the suffering that exists due to our acceptance and allowance of the current system.

The only thing that matters is what is here after death. So if I allow myself to pursue the bullshit of enlightenment or the American dream, in death it has not impact on anything...suffering still exists the fact that people are limited within and as the system still exists, the fact that people will starve, go homeless, be raped, be uneducated, be abused....fuck that not only people but all life existent on this planet. All of that will still exist if I move myself within the `goal` of the American Dream or Enlightenment.  Therefore the only thing that matters to me is what is here when I die, what I allow and stand up against in this world is what matters in death. What I accept as existence is what matters, and I do not accept this existence as a way of life.

This world is disgusting...the human world, the actual Earth is interesting and intriguing, but the world that we have created for humans, the system I will say, is one that does not support humans unconditionally. The system that we have created maims, harms, abuses life to an outrageous extent. It matters to me if this still exists when I die. It matters because I do not want anyone else to suffer through this mess of `life` that we humans are absolutely responsible for.

So from my perspective I am going to die and anything that has been taught that is `worth` achieving in this reality is bullshit to me and does not matter. In death all of my experience of happiness or sadness do not matter, what matters is my physical experience in this reality as well as all others equal and one as me and what they too will experience if this system does not change. And currently this current physical experience on this Earth is HELL for most. What matters to me is the condition of life. Nothing in else in terms of `life` matters. The physical should be a place to express oneself one and equal, with and as the physical, not a labour camp, where if one does not labour they suffer or even that they must suffer as/through labour to be able to live. So fuck my life, fuck my care for my happiness or sadness, or bliss or anything of that. I would much rather experience myself in this physical reality as the physical reality without any limitation or hindrance to my ability to LIVE which is the system that we have accepted and allowed to exist within and without.

I m one vote for an Equal Money System. Investigate it at http://equalmoney.org   As well to bring about a new world we must change ourselves, we must live the change into reality, join the Desteni I process at http://desteniiprocess.com to re-wire yourself from what is here = control by sex, money, influence, emotion, thought and become self directive to bring about a better world.
http://equalmoney.org/support-establishing-the-equal-money-system/